Not The Help I thought I Needed
2 Samuel 23:5 Amplified Bible (AMP)
Now these are the last words of David: David son of Jesse says, and the man who was raised on high, the anointed of the God of Jacob, and the sweet psalmist of Israel, says, 2 The Spirit of the Lord spoke in and by me, and His word was upon my tongue. 3 The God of Israel spoke, the Rock of Israel said to me, When one rules over men righteously, ruling in the fear of God, 4 He dawns on them like the morning light when the sun rises on a cloudless morning, when the tender grass springs out of the earth through clear shining after rain. 5 Truly does not my house stand so with God? For He has made with me an everlasting covenant, ordered in all things, and sure. For will He not cause to prosper all my help and my desire?
I am in school finishing up my degree to obtain my certification and licensing in Marriage and Family Therapy. One of the most amazing things I have learned during the course of my life is your life will often times come full circle, especially when you yield it to the Lord and you are truly seeking Him, and doing well by others regardless of what is done to you, God will make it so that you prosper, and that you obtain goals and desires that only you and He know of. I started out years ago as a psychology major and was told there was no money in that field and that I needed to pursue a career in business. I guess because back in the late seventies early eighties psychology and counseling were relatively new to minorities and often misunderstood. So I abandon my pursuit and went after a degree in business, I have since obtained and MBA and Masters of arts in Education Administration. I still felt unfulfilled and like something was missing.
As I have continued to live and gone on with life, I was being sought out for advice spiritual, marital and general, no matter what capacity or state I occupied or found myself in. So here I am back in school finally getting a degree in what I am obviously called and have been anointed to do. But this journey has not been without its challenges, especially namely statistics. I have been consistently challenged as it concerns this course or any course that contains statistics in any way. This semester I have been facing Research and Statistics. Knowing this class was coming month ago I set up tutoring with one of my old professors, who agreed to assist me with the course. As I started the class I sought him out and kept in touch, but the most unthinkable thing happened, our one session was unproductive and when I would attempt to obtain help via email he would not get back to me. I thought in those moments why do people promise to help and then, don’t? But there was something I did not yet understand. The subsequent weeks I found anxiety was creeping up on me and my homework was taking all week to do, but I would not give up, I would sit in my room for hours and pray and ask God to help me to understand what I was reading and the concepts I was to learn. I felt like I was between a rock and a hard place, but to spite the long hours and the maximum effort, I had a weird underlying sense it would be okay. But Sunday after another challenging week, and not talking to many people because I was struggling and pressing, I checked my grades on my assignments (which I had been too afraid and anxious to do). As I clicked on the grade section of my online course my eyes were filled with tears, because the week I had my one session of help I received a thirty six out of forty and the subsequent weeks where I fought and stayed in God’s face I received a forty out of forty.
How many times have we thought we needed one kind of help, or assistance and got upset when it did not work out? I can account for many times in my life, but the one thing I came to realize this time, is that in these times we may be seeking help that we think we need, when in actuality God is trying to get us to seek His help and draw closer to Him, even when it is something we feel He would not help with. I have found when we are down to what we feel is nothing God is up to a lot of something; I have come to understand that when we feel like we can’t God can. During the course of the past year God has had me relying less on people and more on Him. He has had me pushing passed what people think about me, for Him to prove what I really am, and who He has made me to be. You see often we are seeking the affirmation, validation, assistance and confirmation of people and God is right there wanting us to seek Him, His help and His presence in the situation. Many times we do things and reach out to people, when it is first God we should be seeking and becoming in tune and connected with. Sometimes what we are faced with may seem like human help is the answer, but it is really submission to God and God’s help that we need.
Today whatever you are facing may not be what you think it is; it may be an ends to a means for God to get with us and get our attention. The problem that you understand you need help with, may not require a human touch, but the Master’s touch. The situation you are facing may not be about who you seek, but whom you seek. God may be trying to get us to rely on Him, more and people less. He may be trying to get us to understand that it is Him that we seek, first and if He sends help through human means, great, but if not He is more than capable of helping us, all by himself; He is God all by Himself after all!
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