When You Let Your Kids Take Charge
Genesis 34:1-31 Amplified Bible (AMP)
34 Now Dinah daughter of Leah,
whom she bore to Jacob, went out [unattended] to see the girls of the place. 2 And
when Shechem son of Hamor the Hivite, prince of the country, saw her, he seized
her, lay with her, and humbled, defiled, and disgraced her. 3 But
his soul longed for and clung to Dinah daughter of Jacob, and he loved
the girl and spoke comfortingly to her young heart’s wishes. 4 And
Shechem said to his father Hamor, Get me this girl to be my wife. 5 Jacob
heard that [Shechem] had defiled Dinah his daughter. Now his sons were with his
livestock in the field. So Jacob held his peace until they came. 6 But
Hamor father of Shechem went out to Jacob to have a talk with him. 7 When
Jacob’s sons heard it, they came from the field; and they were distressed and
grieved and very angry, for [Shechem] had done a vile thing to Israel in lying
with Jacob’s daughter, which ought not to be done. 8 And Hamor
conferred with them, saying, The soul of my son Shechem craves your daughter
[and sister]. I beg of you give her to him to be his wife. 9 And
make marriages with us and give your daughters to us and take our daughters to
you. 10 You shall dwell with us; the country will be open to
you; live and trade and get your possessions in it.11 And
Shechem said to [Dinah’s] father and to her brothers, Let me find favor in your
eyes, and I will give you whatever you ask of me. 12 Ask me
ever so much dowry and [marriage] gift, and I will give according to what you
tell me; only give me the girl to be my wife. 13 The sons of
Jacob answered Shechem and Hamor his father deceitfully, [justifying their
intended action by saying, in effect, we are going to do this] because Shechem
had defiled and disgraced their sister Dinah.14 They
said to them, We cannot do this thing and give our sister to one who is
not circumcised, for that would be a reproach and disgrace to us.15 But
we do consent to do this: if you will become as we are and every male among you
be circumcised,16 Then we will give our daughters to you and we
will take your daughters to us, and we will dwell with you and become one
people.17 But if you will not listen to us and consent to be
circumcised, then we will take our daughter and go.18 Their
words pleased Hamor and his son Shechem.19 And the young man
did not delay to do the thing, for he delighted in Jacob’s daughter. He was
honored above all his family [so, ranking first, he acted first].20 Then
Hamor and Shechem his son came to the gate of their [enclosed] town and
discussed the matter with the citizens, saying,21 These men are
peaceable with us; so let them dwell in the land and trade in it; for the land
is large enough [for us and] for them; let us take their daughters for wives
and let us give them our daughters.22 But the men will consent
to our request that they live among us and be one people only on condition that
every male among us be circumcised, as they are.23 Shall not
their cattle and their possessions and all their beasts be ours? Only let us
consent to them, and they will dwell here with us.24 And all
the people who went out of the town gate listened and heeded what Hamor
and Shechem said; and every male was circumcised who was a resident of that
town.25 But on the third day [after the circumcision] when [all
the men] were sore, two of the sons of Jacob, Simeon and Levi, Dinah’s [full]
brothers, took their swords, boldly entered the city [without danger], and slew
all the males.26 And they killed Hamor and Shechem his son with
the edge of the sword and took Dinah out of Shechem’s house [where she had been
all this time] and departed.27 [Then the rest of] Jacob’s
[eleven] sons came upon the slain and plundered the town, because there their
sister had been defiled and disgraced.28 They took their
flocks, their herds, their donkeys, and whatever was in the town and in the
field;29 All their wealth and all their little ones and their
wives they took captive, making spoil even of all [they found] in the houses.30 And
Jacob said to Simeon and Levi, You have ruined me, making me infamous and
embroiling me with the inhabitants of the land, the Canaanites and the
Perizzites! And we are few in number, and they will gather together against me
and attack me; and I shall be destroyed, I and my household.31 And
they said, Should he [be permitted to] deal with our sister as with a harlot?
I have watched a lot of young people grow up. I
have had the pleasure of being mentor, mom, guide, nurse, counselor,
corrections officer and so many other things to many young people that I have
encountered. I have been blessed to be
over teen ministry at two different churches, and as challenging as it was, it
was as rewarding as well. But there is
something about when children get to a place where they are attempting to run
the show, and make grown up decisions that they are not equipped to make, that
can cause an adult that is watching to want to shake them. This is because in many cases they do not
possess the wisdom, restraint and the counsel that an adult does. Most times a young person will react out of the
need in the moment and they are not think about the long term consequences;
they will lead with their emotions and not with the discipline of emotions,
prayer and clarity of thought. I cannot
even say that it is all young people I know some adults like this as well, but
traditionally this is reserved for children, or young people that have not
matured to the place of understanding where they are and what their role is
within the family, or in society.
As I thought about my children entered young adult
status, I thought about how different it seems to be, children now are running their
homes they establish their bed times, what they watch on television and what
they can and cannot do. They are taking
the parental power that is being so easily released to them by their
parents. As my daughter and I walked
through the mall this weekend, window shopping, we were exposed to a mass of
unruly youngsters that had no respect for themselves of others. If they were with parents they were telling
their parents where to go and how to get there and if they were alone they were
caught up in so much buffoonery, it made not just my head hurt but my heart as
well. They thought that their wisdom and
ways were better than what their parents were saying or what they had been
taught or even what they knew was right.
When I got home I ponder the day and as I did God laid on my heart how
similar these behaviors are to how we react with Him. We think we should be able to boss Him, to
override Him and to run our lives on pure emotion or the need of the
moment. We want to do what we want to do
and have Him stand by and watch with no input, correction or consequence and
still be blessed. When we run the show,
how often do we get not just ourselves in trouble, but often times we are
leading others in the ditch right along with us, because we have not taken the
time to pray, stop and even think or find someone that we can talk to that
possesses Godly wisdom. Instead we just
do and pray about it later or just deal with the fall out of the situation.
Just as when Jacob’s sons thought they were correcting a
wrong they did what was right in their eyes, and not in the eyes of their father
and Lord. They deceived and then, went
out on a murderous rampage, of revenge; we will often do the same, with our
words, or reactions and behaviors. We
won’t invoke self-control, discipline or the wisdom of God we would rather do
it our way. You see we have not yet
understood that parents often know a little more, and have acquired wisdom from
living and the mistakes and experiences along the way. Just as God is the only wise God, He is all
knowing, all powerful and He is all sufficiency, but yet we go to such pain
staking lengths to override him, to act not as He has taught us or, instructed
us to. We should know that God knows
just what is best for us as the ultimate parent and mentor, but we have taken
to discarding His wisdom and authority, much as many children do with their
earthly parents. We need to check how we
are living, because living by our own rules will surely produce consequences
that many of us, cannot bare to live with.
As it concerns our relationship with God, Father really does know best,
and we as His children should in grateful obedience and submission to stay in
our lane!
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