The Problem With Your Expectations Are…
Luke 6:34-36 Amplified Bible (AMP)
34 And if you lend money at interest to those from whom you hope to receive, what quality of credit and thanks is that to you? Even notorious sinners lend money at interest to sinners, so as to recover as much again. 35 But love your enemies and be kind and do good [doing favors so that someone derives benefit from them] and lend, expecting and hoping for nothing in return but considering nothing as lost and despairing of no one; and then your recompense (your reward) will be great (rich, strong, intense, and abundant), and you will be sons of the Most High, for He is kind and charitable and good to the ungrateful and the selfish and wicked.36 So be merciful (sympathetic, tender, responsive, and compassionate) even as your Father is [all these].
I remember some time ago my husband and I were having a conversation about him being a bit frustrated over some people he manages and their work ethic. I sat and listened attentively, I felt for him, because I could hear his frustration. When he took a breath, I calmly looked at him and said “Sweetheart you can’t expect that everyone will work as hard as you do and do things in a manner that you do.” I understood that because of his position at the time he had expectations that were outlined in the employees job description, BUT, what seemed to be viewed as common sense to him unfortunately wasn’t so common for those he managed; especially because everyone’s point of reference is different and we all did not grow up in a “Stepford scenario,” instead we were created individuals with free will and each one of us was raised in a situation uniquely our own, which shaped our core values and frame of reference.
Most of us do not realize that there is even a problem with our expectations; we just figure it is okay to expect people to be who we think that they should be. Well, let me first say, the problem with your expectation just as with mine is that they are “ours,” they are what is important to us, not what is necessarily important to God or others and in most cases if we bothered to consult His word we would find He isn’t as concerned about the things we stress over and expect of others, as we think or even expect Him to be. It is so crazy how we spend so much time pulling people apart for all they do wrong and miss the mark on, instead of celebrating what it is that they do right. We have a tendency to cast our fears, apprehensions, anxieties, preconceived notions, need to control, dominate and even our experiences in life on them, expecting that they will react or respond as we do, and when they don’t we have a meltdown or a blow up. How would we like it if every time we did not do as God expected He had a meltdown on us or blow up at us and exposed us? I can speak for myself when I say; I know I would hate it. We often expect without thinking of what is expecting of us and how many times we have failed to even meet the minimum requirements with God. We hold people to standards that we do not meet ourselves, without a thought or a time of reflection upon the mercy, grace and favor we have received when we fell short of the Glory of God.
God created us, and He gave us commands, that are actually suggested method and path for living because He gave us free will, then who is it that we feel we are to hold others to expectations, that are uniquely our own ideals and reflections of what is going on inside of us? We are quick to identify what is unfair treatment, but we do not stop often enough to reflect on what we expect from others, and ask the questions, is it unfair; is it something that we have even been willing to give ourselves? In many cases the answer to those questions is, probably not. Stop expecting people to be who you think they should be, you are only one person with one opinion is this vast sea of individuality. Give people a break and allow them to make mistakes and be the person that God created them to be, after all there is but one judge and jury and that is God Almighty, and the last I looked He wasn’t taking applications for assistants in those areas. Give people the same courtesies that you would want others and God Himself to give to You!
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