Living And Loving Through Rejection, Misuse And Pain…
Colossians 3:23-25 (New Living Translation)
23 Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people. 24 Remember that the Lord will give you an inheritance as your reward, and that the Master you are serving is Christ. 25 But if you do what is wrong, you will be paid back for the wrong you have done. For God has no favorites.
I was approached by someone that had been in a relationship and this individual had bent over backwards to accommodate the individual that they were involved with. They had been understanding of past hurts, pains, discomforts and was sensitive, loving, long suffering and caring in every way that was possible. When the individual they were involved with faced a few crises, they were there to help provide support, aid and to encourage. No matter what the issue, they nurtured, fortified, prayed for, and always tried to speak with care and concern. Admittedly, this individual says they were not perfect, but they put forth a lot of effort to ensure the mental, emotional, physical and spiritual health of the individual that they were committed to, and in love with. The question that I was asked, was how can it be that you can love someone and go out of your way and they treat you so grimy and with such disrespect and disregard. I looked into their eyes, and said if I knew that, I would have the answer to a lot of my own encounters and past issues. The only thing I could offer was the fact that woman are made to love, and men are drawn to love and that she with open heart, and spirit loved openly and freely gave without reservation, because she walked with God, but he could not because he did not and was in a place of condemnation because of what she had done for him, feeling guilty for whatever reasons, whether past experiences or encounters.
As I sat in church tonight I realized that although what I had spoken earlier was truth, I had missed something a major piece of the puzzle, and that was anything that we do, we should be focused on doing it as unto Christ. We should never engage in behaviors, activities, or expressions of love and care to gain anything but the accolades of our Father God, because we are acting in obedience. In most cases if we are looking for people to appreciate us and recognize our value, we will be sorely disappointed, and end up hurt and in despair. I personally have been there, loving people that did not love me back, or at least the brand of love that they gave was far from what I was giving, it didn’t even look like it was coming from the same pile of attributes and characteristics. The other thing that is important for everything we do for people we have to release it and let it go, understanding that we may never see an act, returned to us as we have given it, and we may never have the love and affection returned upon us in the manner in which we gave it. Now before you want to crucify me, I did not say that this was right or healthy, I just said it was factual. We have to learn to love in spite of what we get back, or in spite of what is done, but that does not mean we need to stay engaged in that scenario if the individual does not repent, and turn for those damaging behaviors. God requires us to love, and to treat people kind, and with thought for them. In Luke 6:32-33, it says, “If you love only those who love you, why should you get credit for that? Even sinners love those who love them! 33 And if you do good only to those who do good to you, why should you get credit? Even sinners do that much!” If we can see that God credits us when we love those who do us wrong, but when we love those and celebrate those who love us back, that is no major feat, because even people that do not know Christ do that.
One of the hardest things to do is keep loving and living after you have been betrayed, misused, hurt, disrespected damaged or mishandled. It feels like you have been laid bare and that you have had your insides turned outwards. But loving those who are unlovable, loving our enemies, and praying for those who use us are a part of what God commands us to do. Many of us Christian, rolls off the tongue nice and easy, almost like a warm cup of cocoa, slides down the throat. But living out Loud and loving even when it hurts and continuing to pray for people when they have used you and hurt you is more like chocking down a whole grain cracker with no water. It about makes you choke. God does not just want us to say we follow Christ but He wants us to actually do it, even when it is uncomfortable. But it will become less cumbersome and uncomfortable when we remember that our living and our obedience to love is an offering to God, and when we love those who have established themselves as enemies or ones that have hurt us, God will bless us, and He will also handle the individual that has done the infraction. Live out loud, through a love that will give understanding that we are giving ourselves away for God to use us in spite of who appreciates us or what we do or not. Do what you know is right and let God will handle the rest!
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